Sunday, September 25, 2011

Marital Status

A few week ago I received a compliment from a man while I was bagging my groceries at the store.  Being unaccustomed to such praise from strangers, I merely said "thank you," and tried to go about my business.  He, however, must have had other intentions, for he persisted with his flirtation until I mentioned I was married-- which was about the next thing I said, mind you. At that, he apologized profusely, gathered his groceries and left.  And so, after weeks of pondering how I can avoid future awkwardness, I figure one of three things needs to happen if I'm going to be solo-grocerying:

1.  My husband needs to buy me a larger diamond ring. Much, much larger.

2.  I design a new set of t-shirts to advertise my relationship status as boldly as Facebook.

3.  I adopt a new hairstyle:

Or, I rely on the universal symbol of love: dolphins, and get a tattoo*.

*NB: Ctrl + F "dolphin"


  1. I think about wimples.

    What is it with creeps in the grocery? A bigger ring won't help, I'm afraid. But a baby, in or ex utero, usually keeps them away. :D

  2. I've thought about them from time to time, too. Maybe not so bulky, though...

    And I generally do have my kid with me. This was the weird time I left him in the car with my hubby because I only had to grab two things. I won't do that again.